A Happy and Vibrant Life with Rachel

I would like to talk about emotional intelligence again today.

Photo by Austin Schmid on Unsplash

“When you make people angry, they act in accordance with their baser instincts, often violently and irrationally. When you inspire people, they act in accordance with their higher instincts, sensibly, and rationally.” — Peace Pilgrim

Now, I am aware that this quote using the verb “make” is or can be controversial in regards to provoke verses to make. However, I hope that the point is understood.

Those with low emotional intelligence have several transparent and obvious signs:

1. They are unable to accurately read the emotions of others.
   They lack the skill necessary to predict the emotional responses of other people.

• They also fail to pick up on social cues that transmit emotions to those with emotional intelligence.

2. They are not in control of their feelings. Some people are good at managing their emotions and dealing with them appropriately. People who are low in emotional intelligence are not one of those people.

• Emotions tend to exaggerated related to the lack of skill to soothe themselves.
• Negative emotions also can cause poor decision-making in those with low emotional intelligence.
• People that are easily stressed are often suffering from low emotional intelligence.

3. They behave and speak inappropriately. If you are emotionally intelligent, you understand that some things are appropriate, and others are not. Inappropriate speech and behavior are common experiences in those with low emotional intelligence.

4. They lack the ability, or interest, in sympathizing or empathizing with others. If you are low in emotional intelligence, it is difficult to impossible to help others emotionally with their challenges and issues. People require and need support, empathy, and sympathy sometimes.

I remember stating that my emotional intelligence was low to moderate during my marriage of nine years because I refused to accept that I had issues. You see, when I was actively going to corporate prayer, bible study and volunteering and visiting the sick, etc. I believe that it gave me a sense of superiority and not to mention that I was a nurse.

My ex-spouse was a mirror reflecting my imperfections and I was not emotionally mature enough to accept it. I am not saying that he was perfect either, I am just focusing on myself for the sake of this topic. One prime example, was my ex-spouse had 3 sons who really needed his support. I wish that I could have been more empathetic and concerned or at least demonstrated a desire to try.

Thank God, I am still expanding, exploring, growing, and learning so that I can continue to experience my happy, vibrant life.